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OCTOBER, 1994 Ron Schow,Ph.D Ron Schow is a life-long, active member of the Church who helped edit Peculiar People, Mormons and Same-Sex Orientation, which was published by Signature Books in 1991. Ron was one of the founding members of both Reconciliation and Family Fellowship. Both are support groups for gay and lesbian Mormons. He also co-chaired the first conference on sexuality sponsored by Family Fellowship at the University of Utah in Spring, 1995. The following material was presented at a Family Fellowship meeting held just prior to the U of U conference, April 28, 1995. |
N= 100 (There were several late submittals not included )---- About 25% raised in UT, about 30% in CA; About 80% males; Age ranged 22-66 Yrs, Average age= 36 Yrs
Avg Church Attendance: As Child=93%; As Teen= 94%; As
Young Adult=94%; RM=74%
| "74% were returned missionaries." |
Fine Church families:
6 of their fathers had been in Stake Presidency,
Patriarch, Temple or Mission Presidency
8 of their mothers had been Relief Society or Primary
President
12 of their fathers had been Bishop or Branch President
10 more had a father who served as Counselor to a Bishop
10 more had a close relative who had been Bishop or
Stake President
Now Church Attendance Avg=14%, while belief in gospel: 64% and personal daily prayer: 26%
WHY???? 90% rate at 5 or 6 on the Kinsey Scale--They’ve had to deal most of their lives with Same Sex Attraction (SSA)
by age 13= recognized emotional SSA;
by age 14 recognized sexual SSA,
but didn’t call self Gay & Lesbian
until age 23
Most went through long periods of anxiety, depression or worse
as teens; only 17% avoided that.
| "Most went through long periods of anxiety, depression or worse as teens; only 17% avoided that" |
75% reported attempts to change which lasted on average 11 years
65% counseled with an average of 3.3 church leaders
40% went to LDS Social Services for therapy for an average of 9
sessions
50% went for other counseling an average of 18 sessions
From that effort they estimate a 9% decrease in thoughts of SSA and
18% decrease in behavior; not a huge payoff. Over 50% said there
was no change at all.
| "Over 50% said there was no change at all." |
About 25% tried marriage and were in marriage an average of 11 years
with an average 2.4 children before divorce (well over 50 children now
have gay or lesbian parents in this group); they rate their marriages on
average at a 50% satisfaction level compared to their SS partnerships
which they rate at an 84% satisfaction level and an average of 5 years
longevity.
After all these efforts to change---90% now accept being gay or lesbian--Is this the % therapy success we’d expect for a largely RM group from exemplary LDS families? Why so low?
How has their family helped them:
Up to age 19, 12% said family was helpful; 67%
unhelpful, 21% hurtful
For 15% no one in the family yet knows
For those who know: They feel average
verbal support is 68%; average action type support: 56%
1/3 rate their family support at less than 50%
and 5% get no support
Yet, over 25% know another Gay/Lesbian in immediate family and over 60% a cousin who is Gay/Lesbian
So how well are we doing as families???? Can we do better?????
Are therapeutic efforts to change helping our loved ones???
The data do not support such a proposition.
| "Are therapeutic efforts to change helping our loved ones??? The data do not support such a proposition." |